In the future we'll all be gay
i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
Randomize