apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
My life has come down to me literally sitting on an uncrustables trying to defrost it because I’m drunk alone and hungry.
Randomize
