Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
Randomize
