You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
where are you?
Hypothermia
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
Randomize
