with your own penis?
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Randomize