they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Randomize