Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
are you so shy because you have an std?
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
