Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize
