What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
My penis needs a shock collar
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
Randomize
