4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize