Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
