More tranny stories later!
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
got in a fight at the bar because some dude thought i was being sarcastic when i told him "sweet mustache". it really was a sweet mustache
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
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