we're blogging at a bar
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
They took my balls.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
A bitchslap is in order.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
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