I was born with a shot glass in my hand
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
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