she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Randomize
