If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
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