just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
Randomize
