I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
Randomize
