If i come over, it means nothing
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
Just sold all of my pants in order to buy tonight's whiskey. Goodbye, high functioning alcoholism. Hello, Dad.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
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