i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
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