Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
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