guys are not supposed to queef...right?
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
