How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
Randomize
