Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Randomize
