It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
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