I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
Randomize