His pubic hair was longer than his dick
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
