i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize