Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
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