nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
My phone auto-corrects smirnoff to poisoned. I think it is trying to tell me something.
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
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