I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Randomize