Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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