One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize