your thong is hanging out like whoa
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
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