we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
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