She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Randomize
