Heybabeimwearingurpanties
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
Randomize
