I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
Randomize
