Have you finally orgasmed yet?
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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