does your mom think i'm crazy? i just realized i played both the gay dad and the ex-jew card tonight. i blame the wine
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize
