Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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Sorry ^_~ hasn't picked any favorites yet.

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(603): View more from New Hampshire

Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??

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(305): View more from Florida

best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...

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(202): View more from Washington, DC

Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.

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(614): View more from Ohio

A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML

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