4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
how do you play pong handcuffed?
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
Randomize