Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
Randomize
