I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"
you will always have a special place in my vag
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
I was gonna be Romantic and write your name in emoji eggplants but A's are hard
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Randomize
