I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
Randomize