Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
I was being carried out of the bar, but then my friend saw Pat who just got kicked out scaling the wall to sneak back in, so he carried me back in, sat me on the bar stool, and the bartender just let us all keep drinking.
Being persistent has its perks my friend.
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
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