He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
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