Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
