I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
Randomize