its not stalking. its research.
Life lesson: when driving and throwing up, choose a paper bag over plastic. Fuck my life.
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
Randomize