Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
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